


When I Look At You

by Opatrickr



Series: Coming To Terms [2]
Category: Andi Mack (TV)
Genre: Angst, Family Drama, Fluff, Homophobia, Internal Conflict, Internalized Homophobia, M/M, Religion, Religious Family, cute moments, quiet moments
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-09
Updated: 2019-07-29
Packaged: 2020-06-25 11:25:40
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,976
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19744768
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Opatrickr/pseuds/Opatrickr
Summary: TJ has to deal with the decision's he's made and what it means for him to act on them.





	1. You have beautiful eyes

**Author's Note:**

> Hi, this is my second ever fanfiction, I hope everyone likes it. It's the second part to my work called Heaven, so it may be confusing if you start here lol Anyway if you like it please leave me a comment or a Kudo, I really like hearing what you think!

TJ took a few steps forward and grabbed Cyrus’ wrist, Cyrus froze, “Cyrus, wait.”

Slowly, Cyrus turned around and glanced between the hand on his wrist and TJ’s eyes.

TJ felt his face grow hot, and dropped his grip, “Don’t go, can we just talk?”

It was a fantastic feeling watching a grin appear on Cyrus’ face; the look gave TJ butterflies.

“Should we swing?” Cyrus asked.

“I’d be okay with that.”

They both sat on the swings in silence for a moment.

“I never would’ve guessed that you were going through this.” Cyrus finally spoke. “I’m sorry that you have to.”

TJ felt out of place, part of him wanted to run away and pretend none of this ever happened, but when he looked at Cyrus, that familiar feeling of the world falling away flooded over him like a wave.

“I don’t know what to do.” TJ looked at his feet.

“You don’t have to do anything, TJ.” Cyrus paused, which made TJ look up at him, “I just want you to know, that you liking guys, doesn’t make you a bad person.”

Scoffing, TJ said, “That’s what you think. Every time I look at myself in the mirror, I feel…” TJ’s eyes went back to look at his feet, dragging over the sand.

Cyrus got off of the swing and stood in front of TJ; he bent over to try and reach TJ’s eyes, “You’re not. You are perfect just the way you are TJ.”

TJ sniffed, refusing to look at Cyrus, “Thanks, but I’m sure my dad would disagree on that.” TJ felt a hand on his shoulder and froze.

Cyrus retracted, not wanting to make TJ feel any more uncomfortable. “Sorry, my natural instinct is to try and comfort people when they’re not okay.”

“No, I’m sorry,” TJ looked back up at Cyrus and felt his worries disappear. “It’s nice.” TJ stood up from the swing and was only inches away from Cyrus.

Cyrus didn’t break the eye contact, “Can I hug you again?”

TJ felt his heart flutter and nodded. Cyrus was a few inches shorter than TJ and his face nestled into TJ’s neck. Squeezing Cyrus tight, TJ didn’t want this moment ever to end. The tightness in his body seemed to relax into Cyrus.

Taking a deep breath, TJ was filled with a sense of courage. “It’s you.”

Cyrus didn’t move from his spot for a second. Then he slowly released his arms from TJ and took a step back to stare at TJ with confusion coloring his face, “Yeah, it’s me. What does that mean?”

TJ took a shaky breath, “The boy I like… It’s you.” TJ stared into Cyrus’ eyes. Even though he could feel himself shaking in fear, looking into Cyrus’ understanding eyes, made him feel safe.

Cyrus let out a little puff of air through his nose. “It’s you too.” He said with a nervous smile.

TJ blinked. Then he blinked again, was this actually happening? TJ’s hand went to his thigh, and he pinched himself to make sure that this was his actual reality.

Cyrus’ brows knit together, “Did you just pinch yourself?” he laughed.

For the first time all night, TJ smiled. “Yeah. I can’t believe that this is happening.”

“You’re kind of sappy, TJ Kippen,” Cyrus said.

“Well, you’re really… cute, Cyrus Goodman,” Was all TJ could think of to say back. His brain seemed to be short-circuiting.

Cyrus got close to TJ again, and they stared into one another’s eyes for a second, “So are you.”

TJ felt his face get hot again, “For some reason, when I look at you, I feel like I know who I’m supposed to be. Like you make me feel… safe… and seen.” Clearing his throat, TJ looked anywhere but at Cyrus.

Cyrus’ hand was suddenly on his chin, tugging gently to bring their eyes back together, “I feel like I do see you, TJ. I feel like I got to see another side of you while we were talking tonight. I feel like I’ve always known you.” Cyrus chuckled, “It’s funny that we’ve only ever seen each other in passing, really. Yet, I feel so connected to you.”

TJ smiled at that, that was precisely what he was thinking, “You have beautiful eyes.” TJ’s hand shot up to his mouth and covered it. The words had fallen out without him realizing.

Cyrus giggled, “Thank you, yours are really pretty too.”

Curiosity suddenly flooded TJ, “Can I see your hand?”

Cyrus held it out to him with a raised eyebrow. Lifting it, TJ placed his own against it and saw how he could almost curl his finger-tips over Cyrus’. Smiling, TJ lowered their hands and laced his fingers through Cyrus’.

“Very smooth,” Cyrus said with narrowed eyes and a smile.

TJ chuckled, “I’ve never done this before, it feels… wrong. But at the same time, it also feels so right?”

Cyrus gave TJ a sad smile, “Nothing about this is wrong, TJ.”

A car drove by and sent a jolt of fear through TJ, who jumped back and almost fell over the swing behind him, “I, I have to go,” Was all he could say as he turned to run.

TJ didn’t look back. He just ran. Adrenaline pumping through him, hot tears ran down his face. Guilt was eating away at him a little more with every step he took.

_How could I be such a coward?_ TJ thought to himself, _How could you touch another guy like that?_ He also thought to himself. Everything in TJ’s life suddenly felt like it was falling apart around him. The persona that he had made for himself suddenly felt… fake.

When TJ got to his house, he went up to his room as quietly as possible and threw himself on his bed. His phone buzzed in his pocket, and dread filled him up.

**Cyrus:** I’m not mad at you, TJ.

**Cyrus:** I get it.

TJ stared at the messages. The tightness was back in his body, now that Cyrus wasn’t there to make him feel safe anymore. TJ shook his head and rolled on to his side; disappointment was all he could feel right now. Half disappointed at himself for going in the first place, and the other half for abandoning Cyrus like that.


	2. What did I just do?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TJ has a few conversations about his feelings.

The next morning TJ woke up to sunlight hitting his face. He had forgotten to close the blinds on his window the night before. Taking a deep breath, he sat up, on his bed and looked down at his clothes. He must've fallen asleep without changing from the night before. A weight settled over TJ as he thought back to the previous night. The only thoughts on TJ's mind were, _how could I just leave Cyrus_ , and _why did I go in the first place?_

Instead of dwelling further on the choices that he had made, TJ got up and got ready for school. It was Friday, and he was prepared for the weekend. TJ avoided his father that morning; he was ashamed of what he had done the night before and didn't want to face his dad. On his drive to school, TJ was lost in the memories from the previous night. He could still feel how soft Cyrus' hand felt in his own. The image of Cyrus' chocolate brown eyes staring at him had been burned into his eyelids. Every time he blinked, he could see those beautiful eyes. TJ was glad that he hadn't turned around to see, what was probably a heartbroken Cyrus staring after him, as TJ ran away.

Arriving at school forty-five minutes before it started was not typical for TJ. Being alone in the building, save for the staff, felt strange. TJ walked around aimlessly, eventually making his way to the auditorium. He stood in the door looking into the large empty room, the stage lights were on, which was odd. He walked into the space and let the memories of watching different performances dance across his mind and the stage. All of them featuring Cyrus Goodman. This was the first place that he had ever seen Cyrus. TJ walked up on to the stage and sat on the edge of it and stared out into the empty seats. Even though he played basketball in front of hundreds of cheering fans, the idea of becoming someone else and letting people watch you do that, in almost complete silence, freaked him out.

TJ sometimes wished he was a different person; he sometimes wished that he could escape his life. He wished that he wasn't so easily influenced by other people's opinions of him. Pulling his legs up to his chest, TJ wrapped his arms around himself. Pressing his chin into his knees, he closed his eyes and let the idea of being with Cyrus take over his mind. A smile crept across his face as he sat there, living out a fantasy that could never be.

"TJ?" A familiar voice asked, making TJ jump and glance up.

TJ turned his head to the side and found a confused looking Lester, "What are you doing here?" TJ asked.

Lester laughed, "I could ask you the same thing, man."

TJ stood up slowly, "Oh, I was, just, I was clearing my head," TJ chuckled nervously.

Lester gave TJ a sympathetic smile, "You look exhausted, are you okay?"

TJ had always liked Lester; Lester was the only guy on the team that wasn't afraid to be himself. When he got his first roll in a play, he made sure that everyone knew that he got it. He didn't even care that it was a background part; he had auditioned and made it. TJ liked how comfortable Lester was with everyone; he wished he could be like that.

"I had a rough night," TJ said as he scratched the back of his neck.

"You want to talk about it? Or are you just wanting some alone time, Captain?" Lester asked, sounding concerned.

TJ thought about that, he really couldn't stand to be alone anymore, "Have you ever had to do something that you knew was bad but everyone else was telling you it was okay?"

Lester's eyebrows knit together, "I don't think so, what's going on? Is someone on the team trying to get you to haze somebody?"

TJ sighed and let his head fall back, "No, it's hard to explain. I really want to do something, but I know in my heart that it's wrong. Weirdly enough, though, a part of me can't seem to see what's bad about it. When I look at him, it's like he really sees me. When I look at him, it's like he’s a light that's here to break up the darkness in my life."

Lester's eyes went wide, "Wait a second, this is about a crush? Also, since when are you a poet?"

TJ felt his body go cold, "What? What are you talking about?" he was starting to panic.

"You just said 'when you look at _him_.' Is this guy a serial killer or something? What's so wrong about being with him?" Lester seemed to be getting more and more confused.

TJ felt tears sting in the corners of his eye, "You don't think it's weird… or wrong?"

"Um, liking a serial killer is a little terrible," Lester said with a disgusted face.

"No! I don't like a serial killer; I like a guy." TJ said, feeling exasperated at Lester's cluelessness.

The disgusted look on Lester's face changed into one of compassion, "What? Why would you, liking a guy, be wrong?" Lester walked over to TJ and put a comforting hand on his shoulder, "I mean it's not my cup of tea but to each their own. I've personally been crushing on this girl in the drama club that has the nicest smile I think I've ever seen."

TJ snorted, "You're a dork." Lester laughed and dropped his hand. "Thanks though, I'm glad you aren't freaked out."

"You really shouldn't beat yourself up, Teej. I know your dad isn't the biggest fans of the 'Gays,' but I'm sure his love for you is going to outweigh that dislike." Lester said, smiling.

Lester had a point, TJ's dad, John, loved his son more than almost anything. Although TJ didn't really know where his place was, on that list of love, when religion was involved.

"Thanks, Lester, this helped." TJ smiled as he looked at the other boy.

"TJ Kitten!" Buffy's voice boomed through the auditorium.

Rolling his eyes, TJ turned to face the curly-haired girl, "What, Slayer? How did you find me?"

"I came in through the entrance out here," She motioned behind her, "Then I heard you two hens clucking and decided to come and investigate."

TJ jumped off of the stage and headed toward Buffy. The pair wandered through the school, bumping into each other every so often.

"So?" Buffy asked.

"Oh, right, I forgot to tell you that you're dead to me now," TJ said with a smirk.

"Come on," She poked TJ's side, which made him giggle, and grab at Buffy's hands to make her stop, "It was just a harmless conversation, right? I didn't tell him who you were!"

TJ's heart clenched, "Yeah, we ended up going to the park together last night."

Buffy stopped in her tracks, "You told him who you were?"

TJ turned to face her; his heart started to ache with nerves, "And, I kind of told him that I liked him."

Buffy walked up to TJ and grabbed the sides of his head and started examining him, "Is this TJ Kippen? Or did he get body-snatched by a brave alien?"

TJ rolled his eyes and swatted her hands away, "I regret it." His shoulders slumped as he spoke the words.

"Teej, it's going to be okay. You _will_ eventually find someone who likes you back." Buffy said, slinging her arm around his shoulders as they continued to walk.

"He likes me back," TJ said, feeling his heart break as he said the words.

Buffy dropped her arm and pushed TJ slightly, so they were facing each other, "That's freaking fantastic! Why are you being so, depressing…" She trailed off as she remembered who she was talking with.

"Buff, why did you give him my number?" TJ sounded desperate as he spoke. Buffy went to answer, but TJ cut her off, "You _know_ how I feel about all of this, I can't act on this. But knowing that he feels the same way? It hurts so much." TJ's eyes began to water.

"I just wanted you to be happy… To have someone to talk to…" She said, her face colored with concern.

TJ rubbed his eyes, willing the tears not to fall, "I'm not happy, I'm…" TJ really thought about his next word, "I'm devastated."

Buffy let out a huff, "This is good news Teej, you're not alone! There are other people, like Cyrus, probably going through the same thing!"

"Buffy, stop." TJ wanted to cover his ears, "Stop saying that, this is the worst thing that could've happened. I can't like Cyrus; I can't do that to my soul. I can't damn myself!" TJ was yelling now.

Buffy closed her eyes and furrowed her brow, "Teej, your _soul_ will be fine."

TJ laughed, "Buffy, you don't get it. You don't believe in any of this." TJ motioned to himself, "You don't care about what happens to you. You don't care that you're going to hell, but I do!"

Buffy scoffed, "Did you just tell me, that you think I'm going to hell?"

"That's not what I meant, Buffy," TJ tried to backtrack.

Buffy put a hand up to stop him, "No, no, TJ 'I've got God on my side' Kippen just told, me, his best friend, that I'm going to hell." Rage burned in her eyes, "You know what, _Captain_ ," the nickname was full of venom, "You can go to hell."

With that, Buffy turned on her heel and left TJ standing alone in the hallway. The ache in his chest now spread throughout his body. _What did I just do?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The angst got away from me there sorry... LOL, It's weird to write about this because these used to be things that I thought back when I was in high school/middle school.


	3. Please Don't

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TJ lets go a little.

TJ ended up eating lunch alone that day in one of the empty hallways. He sat there eating his sandwich regretting everything that had happened in the last two days. If he hadn’t fallen for the cute theater kid, none of this would’ve happened. If he hadn’t been _gay,_ his life could’ve been more uncomplicated. Why is it that God would make him this way if all of his people were just going to turn on him when they found out about him? The idea of someone in his family finding out about him made TJ lose his appetite.

Setting his food down, he tried looking through his phone to get his mind off of those thoughts.

“Is that spot taken?” Cyrus’ unmistakable voice asked.

TJ felt his heartache a little more as he answered, “Nope, I was actually about to leave anyway.” TJ refused to look at the other boy.

“Can I go with you? I want to talk about what happened last night.” Cyrus was pleading.

TJ knew what would happen if he looked at Cyrus, so he kept his eyes downcast as he spoke, “I don’t. I can’t. Last night was a mistake.”

“TJ, you don’t mean that; you’re just scared. It’s okay to be scared.” Cyrus said, sliding down the wall to be right next to TJ.

TJ stared at his hands in his lap, “I’m not scared, Cyrus. I’m terrified. I can’t do this; I wish I didn’t like you, I wish I was straight.”

“I get it, life would be a lot easier, but then you wouldn’t be you.” Cyrus’ hand was suddenly on TJ’s.

TJ jerked his hand away, “Please don’t.”

Cyrus let out a huff, “I went through this, TJ. I know what it feels like.”

Frustration bubbled up in TJ, and he readied a verbal attack on Cyrus. But when TJ finally looked up at the boy and saw him, the frustration melted away. When TJ looked at Cyrus, the world shifted on its axis. Everything suddenly felt better. Staring into those kind and compassionate eyes, TJ almost felt like he was being forgiven for every wrong he had ever done. Even if it felt like the waves were flooding his life and making him lose his way, those eyes, Cyrus’ beautiful eyes, would guide him home.

TJ softened, and let his head rest against the wall as he took in Cyrus’ beauty, “How do you do that?”

Cyrus furrowed his brow, “Do what?”

“When I look at you, you make me feel like I belong. You make me feel like everything will be alright. How do you do that?” TJ questioned.

A cute smile crept across Cyrus’ face as he answered, “I’m not doing anything, you do belong, TJ, and everything will be alright. You are perfect just as you are.

TJ felt a rush of bravery and reached out to take Cyrus’ hand. Cyrus didn’t withdraw or move closer; he just let TJ go at his own pace.

TJ took Cyrus’ hand and put their palms together; Cyrus’ small hands felt warm and comfortable against TJ’s. Then TJ laced his fingers through Cyrus’ and stared at the now joined together hands, “You fit so well with me.” He spoke before he could think.

Cyrus giggled, a beautiful sound that TJ wanted to hear more of, and said, “We do fit well together, don’t we?”

“How could this be wrong? When I sit with you and just, be, I feel like I’ve been wasting my time feeling like I’m doing something wrong.” TJ paused and looked back up into Cyrus’ eyes, “Did you know that you’re beautiful?”

Cyrus’ face went dark red, and he looked away from TJ, “Stop, you're ridiculous.”

“No, it’s true, you’re amazing. I’m sorry that it’s taken me so long to tell you.” The ringing of the bell shook TJ out of the clouds he had been floating on. “Crap, I need to go and apologize to Buffy.”

Cyrus looked back at TJ, “Why?”

“I was an ass to her earlier and said something that I shouldn’t have.”

The sound of people coming toward them made TJ drop Cyrus’ hand and stand up.

“Isn’t she your best friend?” TJ nodded, “Then, I think you’ll be fine.”

With that, TJ said his farewell and went off to his next class, feeling better about everything. It was a magical thing to talk with Cyrus Goodman, let alone, look at him.

Buffy Actively avoided TJ all day, literally turning around and walking the other direction when she saw him in the hallways. TJ knew that Buffy could stay mad for a long time, and he didn’t want her to simmer for too long.

As the final bell rang for the day, TJ all but sprinted from his classroom to try and beat buffy to her car. He arrived at her car just as she did.

“Go away, TJ.” She growled at him.

“Buffy, you were right,” TJ said.

She stopped moving and turned to face him, “About what?”  
  


“I’m not alone in this. I have you, and I have Cyrus.” Buffy just stared at him, clearly not impressed, “Also, I’m sorry. I am, you’re not going to go to hell, you’re too good of a person. Plus, if getting into heaven means that I have to give up Cyrus, maybe I don’t want it. Maybe I don’t need it. Either way, I do need you. You’re my best friend, and I shouldn’t have said what I said, to you. Can you please forgive me?”

Buffy sighed, “Maybe, but only if you admit something to me.” A mischievous look appeared on her face.

TJ quirked an eyebrow at her, “What?”

“That it was a great idea to give Cyrus Goodman your phone number.” She said proudly.

TJ snorted, “Yes, it _was_ a great idea to have you give Cyrus Goodman my phone number.”

“Also, that I, Buffy Driscoll, am a better basketball player than you.” She said with a smirk.

“Don’t push your luck, Slayer.” TJ chuckled.

Buffy shrugged, “It was worth a try.” Buffy walked up to TJ and threw her arms around him, “I forgive you.” She said into his shoulder.

“Thanks, Buff.” He said back.

“I could never stay mad at you anyway.” She said as she let go of TJ.

“Want to go and have that game of Horse that we never got to yesterday?” TJ asked.

“Duh! What a better way to make me feel better than destroying you in a game of basketball!” She said poking at TJ’s sides.

Through his giggles, he said, “In your dreams, Driscoll.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I don't know if I'll do another chapter, let me know if you would want that in the comments. Other than that, I hope you like this!


	4. Floating

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> TJ learns some things.

A week had gone by, and TJ had been adjusting to the feeling of letting himself like Cyrus openly. Or as openly as he could manage. Only Lester and Buffy knew about him and Cyrus, and he planned on keeping it that way. TJ knew that a lot of students that went to Grant High School also went to his father’s church.

After spending the afternoon with Cyrus at the park, TJ had gone home to find his dad in his usual spot in the Living room.

“Mrs. Daniels told me something interesting.” John Kippen said to his son, not looking up from his computer.

TJ stopped in his tracks and looked at his dad, “Who is Mrs. Daniels?”

His dad glanced up at TJ with a contemplative look, “She is a new attendee at church. She just moved to town, the house she bought is just across the street from a beautiful park.”

TJ’s heart stuttered, “Oh?”

“Yes,” John said as he closed his computer, “TJ, you know what the bible says about that kind of stuff.”

That kind of stuff, he couldn’t even say the word. TJ began to panic, “I don’t know what you’re talking about…” TJ tried.

John stood up from his chair and took a few steps toward TJ, “You know I love you, son, but I can’t let you do this to yourself. Choosing to be… gay... only ends with death.” His father looked into TJ’s eyes, “You know how I think what being gay is like?” TJ was mortified and could only shake his head, “I think it’s like smoking, smokers tell themselves that it’s not that bad to smoke, but, in reality, they’re killing themselves and everyone around them.”

TJ felt his heart break. His father actually believed that TJ liking Cyrus was killing him and everyone around him. Tears welled up in TJ’s eyes. He couldn’t believe what he was hearing. There was a rushing sound in his ears, and the room began to spin slightly.

His dad placed a hand on his shoulder, “If you want to continue down this path, you can. I just want you to know that I will be a part of that part of your life. I still love you, just not _that_ part.”

TJ swatted his father’s hand away and ran out the door. Tears were streaming down his face as he sprinted away from his house, and those horrible words. He ran until his legs began to burn and then kept running. His final destination was unknown; he just knew that he couldn’t be anywhere near his house.

After fifteen minutes of sprinting, TJ found himself in a neighborhood he didn’t recognize. He slowed to a walk and continued moving. The sun had begun to set, and the cold was creeping into him. Finally, he decided to pick up his phone and call Cyrus.

“Missed me that much?” Cyrus quipped as he answered.

TJ sniffed loudly, “Cy…”

“TJ? Is everything alright?” Cyrus sounded concerned.

“My dad found out,” he said with a hoarse voice.

“Oh no, what happened?” Cyrus asked.

TJ explained everything to Cyrus, then proceeded to send him his location. Apparently, TJ was in Cyrus’ neighborhood because he appeared in record time.

Cyrus walked up to TJ and wrapped his arms around the taller boy’s torso. TJ stood there unmoving for a second before squeezing Cyrus as tight as he could without hurting him.

“He didn’t kick you out, right?” Cyrus asked into TJ’s shoulder.

TJ couldn’t form words; he was too focused on all of the support he could feel coming from Cyrus, so he shook his head no.

Cyrus pulled back and looked into TJ’s eyes, “That’s good. I mean, at least you have that as a silver lining. You also still have me and Buffy too. You know we’ll always support you no matter what.”

“But my dad said he didn’t want anything to do with that part of my life. How can I be myself without that part of me? I can’t just turn that part of me off. I can’t lose a part of me.” Desperation was coloring TJ’s words.

Cyrus didn’t say anything to that. Instead, he just stared into TJ’s eyes. That look sent warmth throughout TJ.

“It’s really amazing,” TJ said with a sniff.

Cyrus’ brow furrowed, “What is?”

“When I look at you, I feel like everything is going to be alright. You make me feel like I can take on the world.” TJ said with a crooked smile.

Cyrus blushed, “I think you’re putting a lot of stock in me that I don’t really deserve.”

“Thank you for coming out here,” TJ said as he pulled Cyrus into another hug.

“Just another service I provide,” Cyrus said.

After that, Cyrus and TJ talked for another hour or so. Even though he hadn’t been kicked out physically, he still felt unwelcome in his house. His father’s words still rang out in his mind. They stung.

“I need to go home…” TJ said. “I really don’t want to though.” TJ folded his arms over his chest.

Cyrus raised his hand to the small of TJ’s back, “It’s going to be okay, Teej.”

TJ relaxed a little at the boy’s gentle touch, “I don’t want to face him, I can’t look at him. Part of me agrees with him, this,” he motioned between them, “Still feels wrong.” TJ sighed, shaking his head in disappointment.

Cyrus lifted TJ’s head with his finger under his chin, “How can caring about someone be a bad thing, TJ?”

“I can’t imagine how it could be, I just…” TJ trailed off.

Cyrus’ brown eyes stared into TJ’s green, “There is nothing wrong with you, TJ. You are exactly who you are supposed to be. I know you aren’t going to be able to understand that right away, it took me a while, and I’m still getting used to it, but you will eventually.” Cyrus’ eyes flicked towards TJ’s lips, then back up to his eyes.

All of TJ’s anxiety seemed to melt away with that look, “Cyrus,” TJ said, glancing down at TJ’s lips.

“Yeah?” He said back dreamily. Cyrus was watching TJ with kind eyes.

“Can I…” TJ took a deep breath, “Kiss you?” TJ asked, nerves making his voice quiet and slightly raspy.

A soft smile spread across Cyrus’ face, “Yeah.” His voice was breathy.

Cyrus moved his hand from TJ’s chin to the nape of his neck. TJ cupped Cyrus’ check, tilting his head slightly. They both closed their eyes as they moved closer. When their lips met, TJ felt like all of his problems were melting away. The world itself seemed to fade away as well. TJ felt like he was floating; the only thing keeping him from drifting away was Cyrus’s hand and his lips. At that moment, TJ didn’t feel scared to face his father. TJ didn’t feel anything except joy, and he could feel that maybe Cyrus was right, maybe he was exactly who he was supposed to be.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you liked this story, if you did, feel free to leave a comment! I'm gonna try and write another one soon!


End file.
